Trying to understand the different types of infidelity and how they are caused, is the first step in saving your marriage. When you understand why you can’t have what you want, you will be able to work on your marriage in a more effective way. It’s been said that marriage is the foundation of any relationship.
Affairs can be caused by many factors. These causes range from physical attraction, sexual attraction, emotional attraction, career, or personal interest. Because each person’s personality is different, each person experiences the same kinds of attraction in different ways. It’s important to know that while we are attracted to the same things we are attracted to different things.
If you were to date a person and fall in love with him or her, but then discover that they are unattractive and don’t like the same things you do, would you still love them? Of course not. That’s the power of attraction.
Think about it – if you are attracted to someone, you would go on dates, find out everything you could about them, and eventually fall in love. So is that what you are doing? Attraction has caused affairs and if you want to save your marriage, it’s important to understand what kind of attraction is causing an affair in your marriage.
Passion. Passion causes infidelity for many people. If you really want to change your marriage and become a better spouse, you need to determine if your passion for your spouse is intense enough to keep a marriage together.
Find out what really turns you on. If you feel it is important to find out what your spouse really likes, take it a step further and find out what they truly feel about you. Once you know what makes them happy, you will be able to turn their passion into something that becomes more than just passion.
Emotional passion. The difference between passionate and sexual passion is that the former is more involved in the person and can cause the release of strong emotions. Even if your spouse is not physically sexually attracted to you, they may still feel deep emotions for you and this can lead to a deeper and longer-lasting intimacy.
It’s very important to find out what your spouse truly wants. If you want to get back into your marriage after your spouse has an affair, it is essential to communicate your feelings to them. This might be the hardest part of learning how to save your marriage after an affair.
Desire. Desire is the desire to be with a person and not just to be with a sexual partner. People often feel stronger emotions around a person who they truly care about than they do around someone who is merely sexually attracted to them.
Some people feel more passionate about a pet than they do to a person. This is called caring passion. The same principle applies to your spouse – if you want to make your marriage work, take it a step further and make it about caring passion.
Another difference between passion and sexual passion is that emotional interest is usually more passive. The person who you are with does not make all the decisions about the partner and does not offer suggestions for the other person. They are more willing to allow the emotions to flow and allow themselves to feel the feelings, even if they don’t share the same attractions.
Understanding the differences between passion and sexual interest and the reasons marriages end because of them is crucial to your own health and your partner’s health. As long as you remain honest with yourself and keep learning more about what makes you and your spouse happy, you will be able to save your marriage and work on improving your marriage even if your spouse had an affair.